Rest and relaxation? What were we thinking?!

Two weeks, four flights, and 6 hotel rooms later, we returned home to Dhaka on Thursday evening, January 10th. We had adventure, priceless moments and lots of family time. We saw beautiful Sri Lanka. We did NOT however, do any resting or relaxing. Anyone who has traveled with two small children knows that there is nothing restful or relaxing about it. I'm not sure what we were thinking, but we won't be planning another trip like this anytime soon.

I didn't keep a diary of our trip, but if I had it would have gone something like this:

Day 1, to Bangkok: Yeah! We're finally leaving on vacation! Can't wait to spend some quality time together and get away! Our flight to Bangkok was delayed a couple of hours, but we got a free upgrade on our hotel room. Luck is on our side!

Day 2, in Bangkok: I love Bangkok. Great food and good shopping. Our hotel is great and Odin enjoys the amenities, like the playroom and the hair dryer, which he uses for drying hair as well as vacuuming. Went to the zoo. At times, it felt like we were the attraction. Here's a picture of a poster from the chimp section which outlines the similarities between humans and chimpanzees. I found it interesting because you're unlikely to see such a poster in the US.

Day 3, in Bangkok and travel to Colombo: More good food in Bangkok. Eric strained his back at the pool. This has been a great start to the trip, but just wait till we get to the beach! The night flight to Colombo goes well and even in the dark, it's quite clear that Colombo is nicer than Dhaka. We check in to the Holiday Inn and crash hard.

Day 4, from Colombo to Unawatuna: We can see the beautiful Indian Ocean from our hotel room. We wake up, have a delicious breakfast, and pack up for the drive to the beach, Unawatuna. For at least a week we've been prepping Odin, 'Where are we going?' He would yell back with a big grin, 'Unawatuna!!' Lily took her first steps in the hotel room. She's growing up so fast!

When the taxi we had arranged to take us to the beach failed to show at noon, we were able to arrange another and leave at 1:30. We arrived in Unawatuna at about 5 pm on New Year's Eve. The 'apartment' we booked (I use the term loosely, as did the guide book) left a little to be desired. It was basically two cement rooms joined by a cavernous cement room which had a few plastic chairs. No AC, no TV, and lighting was provided by single bulbs dangling from the ceiling. When it got dark Odin said, 'Turn on the lights Mommy.' I replied, 'They are on sweetie.'

Oh, we also got a refrigerator which the staff accessed without knocking as needed. We were unimpressed but faced the situation with resolve. The kids don't care where we stay! We've stayed at a million places like this before and had a wonderful time. This will be the same.

We dropped off our bags and headed directly to the beach. We crossed the busy main highway (which was directly in front of our hotel and had to be crossed to reach the beach, another little fact concealed by the guide book). All the restaurants were busy preparing for New Year's Eve so the kitchens weren't taking orders. We finally found one place that would make us some fried rice and french fries. We ate, drank a local Lion beer, and talked ourselves into the place as we tried to keep the stray beach dogs away from the kids. We reassured ourselves that this was going to be so much fun!

With Eric's back still hurting and our hopes less than high, we went to bed at 8:30, exhausted.

Day 5, Unawatuna: We were awoken at midnight by the New Year's Eve revelry- the fireworks lasted about an hour and the rave next door continued until about 2 pm this afternoon. As the firework show began, so did Odin's screams of fear. He hates fireworks and spent hours last night sobbing. When I saw him this morning the first thing he said was, 'I want to go home. Now.' We reassured him that things were going to get better, but it felt like we were reassuring ourselves more than reassuring him.

We readied ourselves for breakfast and headed to the hotel's rooftop restaurant at 7:15. There weren't many people up except those who hadn't yet been to sleep. We ordered breakfast and received some juice and scrambled eggs approximately one hour later. The kids were screaming and fighting and at 8 am it had already been a long day.

But, the beach awaited! Surely playing in the sand would lift our spirits. The beach was truly beautiful with green palm trees and blue-green, clean water. So we played, and we contemplated the tension that surrounded us. My first objective for the trip was that no one get a sunburn. We sat in the shade and lathered on the lotion.

After some play and lunch we were able to verbalize a bit of our discontentment. We didn't like our place. It was overpriced and uncomfortable. We didn't like crossing the main road with the kids. We didn't like waiting for breakfast. We would move hotels.

We trekked down the beach in search of alternative establishments. One place looked perfect- nice restaurant, a pool, and lots of kids. They were booked. Another place had rooms- all musty and moldy. Lily was wailing and Odin dragging when we entered the garden of The Villa. I sat down to nurse Lily and instructed Eric to see a room. Two gay men seated nearby told us the place was the best on the beach and that they had just spent 11 days here. That was enough recommendation for me. They had two rooms available for the next day. It was done. Eric inquired about the price of the rooms, but honestly, I would have paid anything.

I washed our clothes by hand in the sink and wondered where the young travelers we used to be had gone.

Just one more night, we thought. We were all tired and the kids were missing home. Odin acted out- our sweet boy became an unruly child. And Lily was teething which put her in a bad mood. We went to bed with our dwarfs, Unruly and Cranky, at about 8 pm.

Day 6, Unawatuna: We ate breakfast on the beach and packed our bags. We moved to The Villa and happiness again seemed attainable.

The kids could play in the garden. We could sit under the shady tree on the beach. We could eat at the hotel. The rooms had AC and hot water. We were going to make it.

Eric's back began to feel better.

Day 7, Unawatuna: This place was better, but we have planned to stay at the beach too long. Six days?! What were we thinking? Our fair skin can only take the sun for a couple of hours a day. And then what do we do? No playgrounds. No shops. They don't even have grocery stores around here.

Thank goodness the rooms had bidets. These were the perfect height for Odin to play in. He also enjoyed following the garbage truck (a big wagon pulled by a small tractor) around town and directing traffic on the side street. Lily took naps and practiced walking- great for her, tough on mom and dad's backs.

Day 8, Unawatuna: The surf is very rough today. We all took hard tumbles, even Lily. A wave completely took me off guard while I was holding her and we were pulled under. I kept thinking, 'Just hold on to the baby!' We were all fine, but that was enough beach for us for the day.

We made the decision to go back to Colombo the next day. 5 nights was going to be enough. We were done.

Day 9, Unawatuna to Colombo: We drove back to Colombo with a very nice driver who stopped at all the major Buddhist stupas to pray for our safe arrival. When we checked into the Hilton Residence I knew that our choice to leave early was the right one! We had a palatial suite- complete with a separate living area for our domestic help- and amenities included a playground and baby pool. Now this was more like it. We ordered room service and washed our clothes in a washing machine. Odin cooked in the kitchen and swept in the living room.

As great as these digs were, we felt a little depressed. Was this what it had come to? Were we no longer happy unless we were at the Hilton?

We slept soundly and snug in crisp white sheets. Today was the first day since New Year's that Odin didn't ask to go home.

Day 10, Colombo: Ate great food and went shopping for precious and semi-precious stones.

Day 11, Colombo to Bangkok: We were happy to be returning to Bangkok. We checked out at 12 and headed for the airport. About 45 minutes ahead of us on the airport road a bomb exploded killing the senior Minister it targeted. We were glad we hadn't left early for the flight and worried that we might not make our plane. We arrived in time however, and happily, left Sri Lanka. We checked into our hotel, ate dinner, and slept.

Day 12, Bangkok: Bra shopping and a massage provided much needed physical and spiritual lifts for me. It was almost over.

Day 13, Bangkok to Dhaka: Even the 3 hour flight delay didn't dampen our spirits too much. We were thankfully, going home. How had we gotten this vacation so wrong?

We arrived at our house and were met by our staff. Our housekeeper had dinner waiting and the kids were whisked away by their nannies to play in the back yard. We exhaled, and wondered when we became so soft.

We learned some tough lessons this vacation. The top two are:

1. Just because we long to get out of Dhaka doesn't mean that our kids also want to get away. We didn't count on the homesickness factor. They missed their routine. They missed their toys. They missed their food. Two weeks away is too long.

2. We are no longer young backpackers and the kids do care where we stay! We have to face facts about who we are now- tired parents of two small children- and forget about who we used to be- adventurous souls who didn't even need a hotel reservation before they boarded a plane. We are soft. We need to stay at resorts. We need a playground. We need a pool. We need a breakfast buffet. At least for now. Facing this reality took a toll on us but failing to realize it would just inflict more future pain on us all. I knew that Eric and I would grow old together, but I didn't think it would happen this quickly.

So, will we travel with our kids again? Absolutely. We'll just do it differently. We won't stay as long. We'll stay in nicer places. I've already started planning our first trip without the kids however- I'm thinking Spain in about 3 years...

Happy New Year everyone! Here's to a peaceful 2008 filled with love.

Odin, enjoying large machinery in the Bangkok airport

What do you mean the flight's delayed 3 hours???

Sweeping at the Hilton in Colombo

Cooking at the Hilton Colombo

A note from the hotel staff when we checked out at Unawatuna

Father and son on the beach

Mom and the kids in the surf

The beautiful beach at Unawatuna

Lily in the sun

Thank goodness for the bidet

Lily in the garden

Her persona we've named Tiger Lily

Watching the world go by in Unawatuna

The garden at The Villa

Wilted Lily

Ready for beach action

Another view of the beach

Love that hair dryer

Our seasoned travelers. On the last flight home Odin was upset that each seat didn't have an individual video screen.

At the Bangkok zoo- are we the real attraction?

Some examples of how humans and chimps think alike

Checking out

We're off to Unawatuna, Sri Lanka by way of Bangkok. Finally some rest and relaxation! We'll take lots of pictures to share when we're back in Dhaka. Happy New Year everyone!

Christmas Day in Dhaka

Christmas is a very social holiday and therefore, difficult to recreate without close family and friends. But, we did our best. Our kids have never seen snow, Santa, or Christmas lights. They understand very little of the cultural event we call Christmas. As an example, I give you Odin wearing our Christmas stockings as 'gloves'.

They did understand that Christmas Day is the day when we open some gifts. They both enjoyed their new toys- especially the tricycle!

It's tough to share new toys, isn't it?

We did some of the usual Christmas cooking- and eating.

Lily had her first mashed potatoes and loved them.

We had fun playing all day...

And we also got some work done, thanks to Odin.

Hope you all had a great holiday. We were thinking of and missing family and friends around the world.

You know you're a parent when...

... you spend Christmas Eve putting together kids' toys.

Tree of love

About 10 days before Christmas we brought in our tree. Most people say they 'put up' their tree, but we say 'brought in' because our tree lives in a pot outside. It's much bigger than it was last year!

We were unable to locate our beautiful wooden Christmas tree ornaments from Russia (given to us by Lacey) so we decided to make ornaments with pictures of family and friends. Here's are a few of them on our tree of love, hanging by dental floss.

Brishti

Our poor dog Brishti hasn't even made the blog yet! She's cute, but usually not as cute as kids- the competition is tough to beat. Anyway, it's about time we introduced our dog Brishti. Her name means rain in Bangla, but ironically, she does not like water. You can tell by her face here while she's getting a Christmas bath.

When we moved to Dhaka we adopted Brishti from friends who had rescued her and her brother as puppies from the street. She had been hit by a car and still has the scars on her paw to prove it. She an exceptionally intelligent dog (I guess that street dogs are bred to be smart- dumb ones don't usually last long enough to procreate). She's also usually exceptionally dirty which is why she's stays outside. But we brought her in the house and cleaned her up for the holidays.

Lily's steps

Ok, this isn't a great picture of Lily, but it's the only one I have from this momentous week. She said her first words on Tuesday! 'Bye-bye', complete with appropriate hand gesturing. Absolutely adorable. She followed up with a 'hi' on Thursday, and last night I got her to try barking like a dog. This girl learns fast!

She'll be walking soon... There were reports of her taking a few unassisted steps at play group this week, but no repeat performance so far.

Eid ul Azha

Friday was the Muslim holiday Eid ul Azha. It's the second largest religious holiday of the year. To celebrate Abraham's willingness to sacrifice his son to God, they sacrifice animals (usually cows or goats here) and share the meat with family and the poor.

The week before Eid ul Azha, the streets of Dhaka become crowded with goats and cows being taken to market. Most people prefer to spend the holiday in their village homes, since sacrificing animals can be messy. However, there's plenty of sacrificing in Dhaka as well. The night before there were numerous cows tied up outside houses on our street. The clean them and put festive decorations on their heads and necks. Odin enjoyed visiting all the cows on our street.

Early on Eid, someone trained in proper religious sacrifice protocol comes to kill the animals in the street. The family then cuts the animal up for sharing the meat. Less fortunate people from nearby slum neighborhoods come to houses sacrificing for meat handouts. We like to call this phenomena 'meat trick-or-treat'.

Queuing up for meat on our street

Some children with their bags of meat on Eid

Being a vegetarian, I'm not crazy about this holiday. That morning the streets are covered in blood and the smell of dead animal lingers into the evening. However, this is one of the few times during the year that many people in Bangladesh eat meat- usually they cannot afford it. I guess that a little extra protein in their diets can't hurt.

My favorite security guard

Many of you will recognize this security guard from Halloween, even without his hat. He does a very good job of managing all traffic coming in and out of our driveway. And he's not afraid to use his whistle.

Victory Day

Yesterday Bangladeshis celebrated their independence from Pakistan in 1971- they call it Victory Day. In the week preceding Victory Day, intersections are bustling with hawkers selling Bangladesh flags in all shapes and sizes.

Independence day celebrations in a country where many people remember the war for independence are quite different than in a country like the US where independence was won many generations ago. The wounds of sacrifice are still raw and emotions run high as everyone over 40 years old remembers the atrocities that defined the Liberation War. Many of those who fought for Bangladesh's independence are now calling for the prosecution of what they call 'war criminals'- those persons still living in Bangladesh who participated in the systematic killing of intellectuals and academics who supported the liberation movement. As little as a year ago, some of these people were a part of the ruling government.

Goofy hair

Odin's hair is finally long enough to make silly hairstyles in the bathtub. He, he.

Grocery shopping

Wow, I'm really behind on the blogging...



Every weekend we make a trip to the US Commissary. That's where we buy most of our prepackaged foods. It's a small 5 isle establishment that carries most of the essentials. Here's Odin doing some shopping on the cereal isle.

Here are a few goodies from the commissary that we can't get anywhere else.

Birthday parties in Dhaka

We went to our friend Sam's 1st birthday party this weekend. The local snake charmer showed up, as he usually does when he hears of a festive occasion in the expatriate neighborhood. Odin did not like the snake charmer- at all.

He did, however, like the marching band that showed up about half an hour later. If any of you are interested in having them for your next garden party, just let me know and I'll see if I can book them for you. :)

Enjoying the show

Odin's got rhythm

My Lily

Here are a few recent pictures of my Lily. She has just sprouted her third tooth and weighs almost 18 pounds. I love, love, love my girl.

Practicing her new clapping skills

Odin loves her, too.